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In my last post I said that I was the prodigal son’s brother. In this post I will explain what I meant by that. First, for those who are unfamiliar with the story of the prodigal son let me briefly sum up. There was a rich man who had two sons. One of the sons told his dad to give him his inheritance. That son took his money and spent it recklessly on food, booze and women. (That’s the prodigal part; prodigal means to spend money recklessly/wastefully.) He quickly blew through his cash and had to take a menial job feeding pigs. One day he concluded that his life would be better if he went back to his dad and begged for a job as a servant. His dad welcomed him back with open arms – restored him to his former place of honor as a son, and threw a huge party to celebrate his return. The prodigal son’s brother was pissed. He hadn’t dishonored his father, lived a life of debauchery, or wasted his inheritance. He wanted to know why his dad hadn’t thrown him a party? The father told the son that he had always had access to everything he owned. (You can find Jesus’ version of the story in Luke 15:11-32.)

Jessi and I are part of a church where many of the members are recovering alcoholics and drug addicts. Many of these people have thrown away their money, jobs, health, and family by making wasteful and reckless choices. Now they’ve come to God, many of them are coming back to him, and they hope he’ll forgive them. They hope he might have some place in his family for them. They probably don’t expect to ever receive the same reward and honor as others, most would be happy just to get some scraps – just to be servants in God’s house.

The other day I was at a meeting listening to some of the members of my church tell their stories and it dawned on me that if these people were the prodigals then I was the other brother. I was born into a Christian home. I’ve always accepted Christianity as true. I considered my options and thoroughly committed myself to the Christian faith as a teenager. From a very young age I have strived to serve God and obey his commands. I have never walked away from God and wallowed in some wickedness for any significant period of time. Sure I’ve sinned, but I’ve always been a pretty good guy and have never let myself get too far off the path. Those sins I struggle with, I don’t revel in, but shamefully hide from view.

Now, the problem with being a “good” son is one never gets to test and see – to experience – the forgiveness of one’s father. You can languish in the belief that your father only loves you because you follow his rules. As the “good” son you actually might start thinking you’ve earned your father’s love. Those of us who are able to do a pretty good job, comparatively, at keeping God’s commands can develop the idea that God owes us something. In trying to earn that something we miss out on the free love God wants to give us. We miss out on the blessings God, our father, wants to lavish on us, because our relationship is dysfunctional.

The problem with the prodigal’s brother, the problem many religious people have – the problem I’ve had at times – we don’t realize that our relationship with God is dysfunctional, because our lives aren’t as blatantly screwed up as the terrible “sinners” of this world. Our relationship with the father isn’t what it’s supposed to be, but we don’t realize it. We think we’re doing just fine, because we aren’t like our brothers who spend all their money on sex, drugs, and booze. Just like our brother we think our father doesn’t forgive failure, we think our relationship with him is based on our ability to keep his law. And, just like our brother we are spiritually lost. We are all desperately trying to find purpose and worth in this life.

We all put our trust in something hoping it will give us meaning, make us happy, make us feel like we are worthwhile and good. Some of us look to sensual pleasures; some of us look to rules and regulations. But, the only way to fulfill our purpose for existence, the only way to be good, the only way to life is to be in right relationship with God our father. We religious types need to put our trust in him, not our ability to live up to some moral standard. We need to realize that our father is waiting for us to come home too.